Making choices and
your proactive action

Ready for takeoff? AF! It is the starting signal of your proactive thought wanting to move forward immediately. Your reactive thought prefers to linger. It fiddles with the starting blocks, waits for instructions, wanders off and sees rain coming. A comical image, but what happens when you really start looking at your thoughts this way? You are not your thoughts, but you can control them. How do you increase proactive behavior and take responsibility for your choices?

Proactive behavior vs. reactive behavior

A victim role is not a popular role, but it lurks more often than you think. It is not always present in a big way, but hides in small moments. It’s Monday and exactly on that day an important presentation is scheduled, too bad. Or you have a date and your attention is focused on a pimple that appears at the wrong time. Victimizing behavior is recognized by shifting blame. Externalizing. As if situations happen to you instead of you being part of the cause.

It helps to recognize where a negative thought begins. If you don’t, it spirals. Your mood drops, you lose focus and you stay in your head. As a result, you convince yourself that you have no control over the situation. This leads to avoidance, complaining or inaction. The negative energy grows and your circle of influence gets smaller.

Powerful proactive behavior

Thinking in possibilities sounds like a cliché, but a cliché is created for a reason. In this case, it really works. Thinking in possibilities directly affects your mindset as well as the atmosphere around you. The first step is to allow what is happening. You acknowledge your thought, your emotions and the situation itself. This keeps you in the here and now, the place of influence.

Next, look at your sources of strength. Who can you ask for help? What qualities do you deploy? Or does the situation require acceptance? By answering these questions, you create space to adjust your behavior and take responsibility. That is acting proactively.

Circle of influence and challenges

Proactive people focus on the long term. They know where they want to go and set focused priorities. How do they deal with challenges?

• By exerting direct influence. You work on your own behavior and address what is within your capabilities.
• By influencing indirectly. You influence situations through relationships with others. This only works if that relationship is healthy and you act with integrity.
• By accepting. Some situations are beyond your control. Then acceptance is often the most effective choice.

If you know which category the challenge belongs to, then it is possible to take a step toward a solution. You have influence over how you react to a situation, so with that, you have influence over that same situation. Do you go for the reactive or proactive approach?