Turn impeding thoughts
into helping patterns
Rethinking to a new perspective
How you look at the world determines how you behave. Your thoughts can help you, but they can also limit you. Impeding or supporting thoughts affect how much ownership you take over your time, your choices and your life. The question is how to take back the wheel and consciously influence your behavior.
Impeding thought patterns
Thoughts that hold you back or interfere with your direction undermine your goals without you even realizing it. Sometimes they are so small that you don’t even notice them, yet they affect your behavior. Becoming aware of these patterns is the first step. Only when you recognize them can you redirect them to thoughts that do help. After all, behavior always follows your thinking.
Common patterns are:
- Disaster thinking. You are constantly thinking about what could go wrong. You are fighting ghosts and it takes a lot of energy.
- Perfectionism. Mistakes are not an option. You are primarily concerned with avoidance rather than achievement.
- Low frustration tolerance. You put off responsibilities. You let others decide or just wait for the situation to decide for you. Problems actually grow as a result.
- Demanding thinking. Things have to go your way. You worry about things you can’t influence.
- Seeking affirmation. You often need approval or appreciation. The opinions of others outweigh your own course. This often leads to disappointment, even in yourself.
Rethinking to a new perspective
Obstructive thoughts feel intractable, but they are merely ingrained patterns. Patterns can simply be addressed. By recognizing them, you can respond to them. Ask yourself the following questions to analyze your thoughts:
- To what extent does this thought help you move forward?
- Is the thought true? How sure are you?
- What is the worst that can happen?
- What changes when you replace this thought with another?
- How do you feel about that alternative and what behavior follows?
When you explore this, the opportunity arises to create a new perspective.
- What other thoughts are possible in this situation?
- What would you say to your best friend in the same situation?
- Which thought helps you the most? What need is underneath?
- How can you better deal with this thought when it comes up?
Interval
Between a thought and your behavior there is always a small moment. Short, but very valuable. That interval gives you your chance for a mini time-out. To ask yourself what you are doing and choose a different response. This video shows you how your thoughts don’t have to automatically lead to negative behavior. Your thoughts may set your course, but you choose how you sail.
