Turning resistance
to cooperation
The art of questioning
Your interlocutor comes up with criticism, doubts or objections. Sometimes this resistance seems to come out of nowhere, while it often has a clear cause. How does resistance arise? How can you turn resistance into involvement without pressure or persuasion?
Preventing resistance
Resistance usually arises because someone does not feel heard, acknowledged or taken seriously. Sometimes a proposal does not align with what someone feels is important. Want to reverse resistance? By ensuring rapport, exploring the other person’s needs, creating agreement and focusing on interests, you significantly reduce the likelihood of resistance.
Establish a good rapport
Good communication requires a strong substantive message and a healthy relationship. When someone feels that you are not acting entirely in their interests, their willingness to move with you decreases. Even a good proposal is then less likely to be accepted. Therefore, invest in trust. Show that you are open to the other person’s perspective and actively seek solutions that work for both of you. This will create a greater chance for cooperation.
Explore the other person’s needs
Sometimes we tend to shoot immediately into solution mode when another person asks for help. This sometimes makes the other person feel unheard. It can also be unclear why a solution is needed, which creates resistance. Therefore, ask open questions first. Clarify the problem behind the question. Only when you understand what someone really needs can you make an appropriate proposal.
Create agreement
In conversations, people often start with their point of view. The arguments follow later. This is counterproductive. As soon as someone hears another point of view, the willingness to listen decreases. Reverse the order. Start with the justification, followed by the proposal. This way you arouse curiosity, making the other person more open to what you are saying.
Focus on the interests, not the point of view
Positions still clash sometimes. Interests connect. When someone sticks to a position, it is rarely about that position itself, but more about what lies beneath it: certainty, clarity, time, influence, quality or something else that is meaningful. Discovering what interests are at stake creates openness to alternatives that suit both parties. That reduces resistance and increases the likelihood of agreement.
The power to redirect resistance
Do you want to learn to deal with rebuttals and resistance? Become stronger in recognizing resistance and being able to turn it into cooperation? The training course Effective Communication teaches you how to use conversation techniques that produce results in practice.
